How to Choose a Sex Toy for Your Wife or Female Partner

How to Choose a Sex Toy for Your Wife or Female Partner

Sex toys, glorious sex toys! The most delicious invention since sliced bread. And when you think about it, sex toys are so much more than aids for our sexual health that get one to climax! Did you know that there are several benefits to orgasming

For one, they relieve stress, they induce peaceful sleep, they boost your happy hormones, and they can help you relieve pain temporarily. It appears as though an orgasm a day keeps the doctor away, right?

So today, we’re going to be talking about how to choose a sex toy for your wife or partner. In other words, sex toys for vulva owners… but with a twist. You see, we’re not just going to introduce you to sex toys for your wife or partner, but also sex toys that you can use with your wife or partner. A double dose of sheer bliss, shall we say?

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Choosing a Sex Toy for Your Wife or Partner

Every relationship is different, and that applies in all areas. In the sex toy arena, your wife or partner may absolutely adore sex toys, they may have never used them or they may despise them. The first thing you need to do before choosing a sex toy for your wife or partner is to communicate with them.

Whatever your dynamic may be will determine how you approach the subject. If you two have used sex toys together before, perfect–the conversation should go quite smoothly. If it’s a new bout of pleasure you’re hoping to bring into the relationship, touch on the subject lightly. 

When you two are feeling comfortable and happy together, bring up the subject of sex and different things that you’d both like to try. If this goes well, you could bring up the topic of using sex toys in the bedroom. Better yet, asking her what kind of stimulation she likes will definitely be in your best interest, as this will gauge what kind of sex toy to choose.

If you’ve been given the green light, or you already know that she’d adore a (new) sex toy and know what kind of pleasure she enjoys, look at the different types of sex toys available for your wife or female partner.

The Different Types of Sex Toys for Your Wife or Partner 

For vulva owners there are different types of sex toys available to tease and please different erogenous zones. They come in various shapes and sizes, work at different speeds and vibrations, and offer all kinds of bliss when it’s the perfect fit.

The different types of sex toys for your wife or female partner include:

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What Questions Should You Ask Yourself to Figure Out Which Sex Toys Your Wife or Partner Would Like 

Now for a bit of introspection. While we’ve given you a few tips about how to talk to and approach the subject of using sex toys with your wife or partner, there are some things you could ask yourself too.

For one, what is your take on sex toys? Are you pro or against? And if you’re not really a sex toy kind of person, why are you considering buying your wife or partner a sex toy? We think it’s great to be open-minded and to give your partner the freedom to enjoy different types of stimulation, but if you’re not comfortable with the idea, you simply don’t have to.

Secondly, ask yourself what kind of stimulation you like. This is a good question if you’re opting for a couple's sex toy because both you and your partner will experience shared pleasure. Knowing this will most definitely help in spicing up your sex life.

Then, when choosing a sex toy for your wife or female partner, take a look at the brand and specifications. Take note of how to use the pleasure product, and see if it’s something that you think you could handle with ease. If the toy is solely for her pleasure, and you’re hoping to use it on her, you’ll have to feel ready to operate it.

Lastly, if you’re looking to buy a sex toy for your wife or partner for a bit of mutual masturbation or to watch them play with themselves, think about a toy that would get you all riled up. What kind of stimulation does she like, and what kind of toy would make you weak at the knees watching her use it?

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Sex Toys That Are Suitable for Your Partner and Couple Play 

As we mentioned, using a couple's sex toy is like a double dose of sheer bliss. So we’re always on board when it comes to recommending pleasure products that’ll take you from zero to hero in the bedroom, together.

With that, let’s look at some of the most popular couples sex toys available today:

 We-Vibe Chorus

We-Vibe Chorus Couples Vibrator

The true winner, and We-Vibe is notoriously known for making luxurious, pleasure-inducing sex toys. This toy is customised to fit her unique body and is easily adjustable. Once inserted, you can take charge of either the squeeze remote (which gets stronger the tighter you squeeze) or control her pleasure via the We-Vibe app, We-Connect. With its app capabilities, you can literally play with your partner from anywhere.

Lovense Dolce

Lovense Dolce Quake Clitoral and G-Spot Vibrator 

Also a great choice and is an exceedingly popular toy for women. In fact, it’s well-known to be used for long-distance fun via their app, so you and your partner can always come together, no matter how far apart you are. This sweet treat is inserted into her, providing dual stimulation (clitoral and G-spot). It has two motors for even more euphoria and is one of the most powerful toys in the Lovense collection. Simply download the app and control her sexy vibes.

LELO Tiani 3

LELO Tiani 3 Couples Massager.

This couple's sex toy is different from the two above, as it’s worn by her during penetrative sex. In this way, it’s not about you controlling her pleasure but instead, sharing the pleasure. It also comes with a remote control that can be controlled via SensMotion technology (a simple flick of the wrist will adjust its intensity. What a way to ‘up’ your sex life!


Then, if you want to choose a sex toy for your wife or female partner that isn’t a couple sex toy, but rather something that either you or her can treat herself with, take a look at our recommended sex toys for women. Whatever she loves, you’ll find something saucy for her here.

Our Recommendations From a Female User

We’ve spoken to our female JOUJOU sex therapist and rounded up 6 of the most delicious sex toys for women. Be prepared to blow her mind with one or more of these beauties.

Does Your Wife or Partner Love Clitoral Stimulation?

 LELO Sona Cruise 2

LELO Sona Cruise 2 Clitoral Sonic Massager

The LELO Sona Cruise 2 Clitoral Sonic Massager is an award-winning sex toy that’s gotten the whole world talking. It’s arguably the best clitoral stimulation sex toy on the market today and uses SenSonic technology to really stimulate her sweet spot. It does this by absorbing some of the sonic waves and putting them back into her body around the clitoris, stimulating more of these erogenous zones than your ordinary clitoral sex toy. A must-have for women who love this kind of pleasure.

Does Your Wife or Partner Love G-Spot Stimulation?

 LELO Mona Wave

LELO Mona Wave Come Hither G-Spot Vibrator

Hitting the spot has never been easier for women who adore G-spot stimulation. The LELO Mona Wave Come Hither G-spot Vibrator is not only shaped in such a way that it’ll stimulate the G-spot, but it also waves effortlessly, creating that ‘come hither’ motion. Simply have her insert this gorgeous pleasure product, turn it on, and enjoy the sweeping waves of bliss against her G-spot. Hint: Add a bottle of the LELO water-based Personal Moisturiser so she can slide even further into sexual ecstasy. 


Does Your Wife or Partner Love Dual Stimulation?

 We-Vibe Nova 2

We-Vibe Nova 2 Rabbit Vibrator

We love rabbit vibrators! And they’ve evolved so much since its inception, giving vulva owners all kinds of sexual sexiness. With that, the We-Vibe Nova 2 Rabbit Vibrator is considered an absolute favourite for women. It showers your wife or female partner with dual stimulation, resulting in double the orgasm (clitoral and G-spot). It’s been designed in such a way that it’s easy to adjust, making it comfortable for her, and stays in place once she’s ready to play. What’s also fun about this We-Vibe rabbit is that it can be controlled via the We-Vibe app, so you can join in on the fun.

Does Your Wife or Partner Love Oral Sex Stimulation?

 Lelo Ora 3

LELO Ora 3 Oral Stimulator 

Another winner from LELO, the ORA 3 Oral Stimulator is pure perfection. It’s got an elegant design, is award-winning, and will make your wife or partner melt during the climax. It uses IntelliSense technology to increase the intensity of the vibrations when more pressure is added and gets to work with a rotating nub that gives off a combination of different vibrations and patterns. Fun fact: it moves 25 per cent faster than a real tongue!

Dame Aer

Dame AER Pressure Wave Suction Vibrator

This clitoral suction vibrator looks beautiful and is something almost any woman would love to have on their nightstand. But its aesthetically pleasing exterior is not all it’s good for! The Dame AER Pressure Wave Suction Vibrator uses pressure wave technology to create rhythmic pulses of air, stimulating the clitoris with absolute ease. The result? The feeling of a tongue fluttering ever so deliciously on her sweet spot.

Does Your Wife or Partner Love General Erogenous Zone Stimulation?

 Le Wand Personal Massager

Le Wand Personal Massager

For an all-over-body kind of sensual massage, the Le Wand Personal Massager will deliver. It’s a rechargeable vibrating pleasure product that can be used externally, allowing her to experience bouts of erotica on her vulva, clitoris, nipples, or anywhere else she pleases. This is a fun toy for couples too, as you can use it for your erogenous zones as well. Or, you could both use it to ease aching and sore muscles if that’s what you fancy! A multi-use sex toy that’s perfect for you and your wife or female partner.

Now that we’ve indulged in all the deliciousness of sex toys for women, which one do you think will float your lover’s boat?

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