The complexity of the human brain is sometimes a curse that is hard to deal with.
And while most of the time we feel alone in our struggle to overcome certain issues, there are various channels that can help you to live your best life despite mental or physical illness.
Which why we’ve created a small guide on how to enjoy play time while living with body dysmorphic disorder (BDD).
We’re all human and we all have our own demons that create challenges, negative reactions, and distress in our lives, but we only wish the best possible sexual experiences and happiness for you.
What is Body Dysmorphic Disorder?
Body dysmorphic disorder is when one obsessively believes that they have a flaw or flaws in their personal appearance.
For example: repeatedly telling themselves that they are unattractive, or being unhappy with their nose, skin, lips, hair or weight etc. while others are unable to notice said-flaw.
People who have BDD are usually social withdrawn, often very preoccupied with their appearance by trying to hide what they believe to be a flaw, and often undergoing frequent surgical procedures that leave them feeling unfulfilled.
Those who experience BDD feel nervous, shy, or simply unable to have or enjoy sex.
With that, here are a few tools for those living with BDD who are yearning to feel good during sex (once again).
Talk with your partner
As cliché as it sounds, having a partner that respects you is so important when it comes to feeling good in the bedroom.
And even if you don’t believe your partner when they tell you that they think you’re beautiful, gorgeous, handsome, slim or attractive, having them know how you feel about yourself so that they can understand you better will go a long way when it comes to play time.
You two can also start off small by using a device-controlled sex toy. In this way, you can both enjoy the perks of sexuality, while being in a setting that you feel more comfortable.
By using a controlled sex toy, like the Remote Control Butterfly, your partner can have access to the remote while you enjoy the sensations near or few steps apart. There need not be physical touching in this scenario, which may help.
CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) is a psychotherapy treatment that gives one the tools for successful problem solving while working to change their thought process.
In this way, you can re-wire your brain so that you have a more positive body image, and see yourself as you should – amazing and utterly desirable.
Take time to really think about what is causing your negative body image, and try to remember a time when you felt comfortable in your own skin.
When was it, who were you with, and what feelings – be it sexual or emotional – were you experiencing?
Try to take small steps to bring about those safe, happy and secure feelings that you once felt, either by yourself or with a partner.
Play Time, Lights Out
Engaging in any sexual activity for someone with BDD can be a very stressful experience, which is why opting to have the light off during play time and getting under the covers, could bring more comfort and assurance.
Women vs. Men
For women who have been diagnosed with BDD, something that may bring a touch of comfort to you is the fact that women and men are like two different species.
You may feel a complete lack of confidence because you strongly dislike your thighs or your arms, but for most men – they’re not focusing on that one thing you are. If they weren’t interested in you, either emotionally or sexually, they wouldn’t be there.
The power lies with you. So taking time to enjoy your body by yourself is a great way to become more comfortable. And there are so many great toys you could try to ensure maximum pleasure.
A Bodywand is such a favourite among women, and is easy to use. Simply turn the lights down, and give it a try – you’ve got nothing to lose, and it’s a great step in the right direction.
At the end of the day, it’s your level of confidence and self-image that makes you attractive. Accepting yourself and seeking guidance and help in overcoming whatever it is that is stopping you from being you, is a great way to enjoy the sexual pleasure that you really deserve!
Helena at JOUJOU